I did it. I saw Twilight.
I don't even know what to say about it.
So- maybe I'll take a different approach to my movie review with this one:
Edward. Why is your hair so big? And you are supposed to float when you walk. Why did you walk down the hall like a gorilla? I wanted you to be Prince Charming in vampire form. I guess I didn't hate you, but I didn't dream about you the night after either.
Bella. I think David put it best when he said this "Was she supposed to be constipated the whole movie?" I know she was written as awkward, but come on.
Rosalie. Uh.... Isn't she supposed to be the hot one?
Jasper. Where have I seen you before? Oh, that right...
There were a few times that I actually laughed out loud during the film. One time in particular was when they lined up on the baseball field and were about to have a serious show down- jets verses sharks style. Another was Edward's tree climbing adventures.
Ok- it wasn't all bad. The kissing was sexy.
I mean- yes, the book itself was cheesey, but it played out so much better in my head. I don't know why they didn't choose me to cast and direct the film, but if they would have- it would've been a dream come true. I'll have my people give them a call so we can get started on A New Moon.
What it's worth to me:
If you've read the book of course you have to see it. In fact, if you've read the book you have already seen it. I'd watch it again- to see if it's better the second time, but I'm pretty sure it won't be. Also, I wish there was more making out. I give it some shifty eyes and maybe an out loud "zing" or two.
Oh, and I can't tell you how scared I am for The Breaking Dawn movie. CGIed babies? Lets hope for the best.
