Thursday, December 4, 2008

Twilight.



I did it. I saw Twilight.

I don't even know what to say about it.

So- maybe I'll take a different approach to my movie review with this one:





Edward. Why is your hair so big? And you are supposed to float when you walk. Why did you walk down the hall like a gorilla? I wanted you to be Prince Charming in vampire form. I guess I didn't hate you, but I didn't dream about you the night after either.


Bella. I think David put it best when he said this "Was she supposed to be constipated the whole movie?" I know she was written as awkward, but come on.


Rosalie. Uh.... Isn't she supposed to be the hot one?


Jasper. Where have I seen you before? Oh, that right...





There were a few times that I actually laughed out loud during the film. One time in particular was when they lined up on the baseball field and were about to have a serious show down- jets verses sharks style. Another was Edward's tree climbing adventures.

Ok- it wasn't all bad. The kissing was sexy.

I mean- yes, the book itself was cheesey, but it played out so much better in my head. I don't know why they didn't choose me to cast and direct the film, but if they would have- it would've been a dream come true. I'll have my people give them a call so we can get started on A New Moon.

What it's worth to me:

If you've read the book of course you have to see it. In fact, if you've read the book you have already seen it. I'd watch it again- to see if it's better the second time, but I'm pretty sure it won't be. Also, I wish there was more making out. I give it some shifty eyes and maybe an out loud "zing" or two.

Oh, and I can't tell you how scared I am for The Breaking Dawn movie. CGIed babies? Lets hope for the best.

12 comments:

Alesha said...

You crack me up! I actually loved the movie but went in with low expectations. I could have def handled a little more action...and I mean like the one bedroom scene!Ü Although when I hear peoples complaints about it I can see there points I still really liked it. I have seen it twice.

Jenn said...

I think that at the first of the movie edward seemed a little "special"

and the music killed me! at times i felt like i was watching PBS or some woman's show on lifetime.

you are DEAD on about Edward Scissorhands!

All that being said...strangely...I want to see it again.

Cicely said...

Me too, Jenn. Me, too.

em said...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2Obs7Wm2tug

K, I couldn't find the clip that I wanted but this is kinda close. The woods scene was, well... akward. The movie was ok. I was worried what Dan was thinking the whole time. He said it was better than he thought it would be. I agree with you on everything.

Cicely said...

ps. I can't take credit for Edward Scissorhands. I thank Cassandra for that one and man was she right.

Cicely said...

Em-

That is the Benji music you were talking about? That is hilarious. I didn't notice it on Twilight, but I will next time I see it.

Unknown said...

Love it! (Your review I mean)
Emily

Spencer Davis said...

Sounds like the franchise is failing to me. First everyone hates Breaking Dawn and now the movie totally blows.

I am excited about one thing. It wasn't until I saw the trailer for Twilight that I realized that the guy who killed Marisa on The OC was actually a vampire. What does that mean? It means that Ryan Attwood is one tough as nails sonofabitch because after Marisa died, he beat the crap out of that vampire.

Nate and Jacque Holt said...

It's refreshing to hear people who actually agree with me...it sucked period. Nate's whole side of the fam liked it or loved it. what kind of family did I marry into if they appreciate crappy movies like this one??

Amber said...

Hey Cic!! how are you!? any baby yet? Hope your doing well... can I get your address please! thanks!!!

jolyne77 said...

I haven't seen or read it...I'm not sure what all the hub-bub is about (why is that even a word?) So...I'll take everyone's word that it's super cheesy...and wait for redbox...and a free code redbox at that. ;-)

Mary said...

Hahaha holy cow, I am still laughing about Edward Scissorhands! You really need to update this blog some more. You are just too funny.

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My name is Cicely Suite Cain. I'm a wife to David and a mother to Miles and Faye. We live in "Cleveland, Ohio!" where Dave is going to med school. That is me. Livin' the dream.